aerasio

Romanticism

She was crying. Droplets of steaming water rolled down her cheeks and drenched her collar. Her eyes blinked rapidly, as if trying to stench the flow, but they would not stop. Her lips opened to wail, but curled into a snarl. "What is true love then! You say my love for you isn't true! WHAT IS TRUE LOVE THEN!" I turned away, unable to face her. How could I answer that, answer her. Why was it so hard to even lift my eyes from my feet. I was rooted, speechless, like a petrified tree. The silence was solid almost, like a huge pillow of immense pressure that filled the room and strangled me. Tension built up, like a host of ravening demons poised to swoop down and consume me at any moment, but I was cold inside, afraid. Ice gripped my heart and I was rendered useless by it, completely unable to face her......

Seconds passed, and as they went, each felt like an aeon. Then they were gone, and all hope for us was lost... forever......


Emotional, cliche, but, perhaps to the less skeptical, moving even. Then again I should just speak for myself I guess. Thats not the point, the point is that this is a familiar scene. There are hundreds of examples, from popular fiction, romance novels, Hollywood blockbusters...... It is a romantic nightmare, a blazing confrontation between lovers. The man, caught cheating on the woman perhaps, who then erupts into a jealous rage and demands an explanation. The viewer wonders why they just can't all get along and make up already so we can all go home (or if you're my 2nd brother then why script-writers come up with such stupid plots in the first place). Perhaps, the more well-known cliche is the Great Love Story. A passionate tale of a man and woman who fall inexplicably and uncontrollably in love with each other (They find ways to include this in movies on just about anything). These passions have done everything from cause the ruin of kingdoms to absolutely nothing and have been a staple of popular fiction since popular fiction existed (regardless of how ludicrous the story is).

The thing is, that I've been affected tremendously by it. The cliche's, the absurdly ideal situations. It reflects itself in my writing, my poetry, my wishes and dreams. It prevades, sometimes every fiber of my being, appearing suddenly in the deepest recesses of my mind. It scares the shit out of me sometimes. And other times, I accept it, want it, yearn for it even, and that scares me all the more. They are dangerous because they can blind us to reality, make us yearn for the impossible, believe in what cannot be. It isn't confined to love either. Just about every fictional work in the world is romanticised in one way or another. JRR Tolkien refrained from calling LOTR a novel, as he felt it was a heroic tale, a romance. Stories like "Dune" and "The Chronicles of Narnia" are works of genius, but don't even take place in our world. A perhaps more apt example is Japanese Anime and Manga. Most anime characters are impossibly perfect physically. Almost every guy is a prettyboy and almost every girl is ludicrously cute. They go about their business in impossibly surreal and ideal plots and situations (being demon-like fighters who are undefeatable or having byzantine love triangles). They are grand, wonderful adventures that never go wrong and always turn out happy. Whos characters always have the perfect mix of flaws and virtues (You know the kind who will always end up with the girl). We are upset at them when they don't, say that they aren't good if they don't give a satisfactory ending. We are spoiled by the feel-good films and the 'Greatest Romances of All Time'. So much so that sometimes we can't look life in the eye anymore. It has become to painful to realize our own mortality and reality. If that isn't scary, I don't know what is.

Inside, I know my wishes can't be fulfilled. My longing for a 'happily ever after' is perhaps not to be. I have doubts in myself, doubts in my character. Belief overwhelms me and then abandons me in the twitch of an eye. I am confused, unsure of what to believe in, and seeking for the truth. Yet, sometimes I don't find it, and am left in a lonely place. The worries of the world come knocking at my door while I am consumed with the worries of the mind. I am troubled. It would be wonderful if things could be so beautiful, and sometimes I wonder......


Maybe I just think too much : P

(In hindsight, that piece of writing was a bad example of what I was talking about. Refer to earlier cornier and cheesier works on this blog for better examples.)

So said Aerasio at 21:19